Nano Word Count: Ummmm, Frankie...you haven't really updated me in a few days.
Frankie: Yeah, soooo?
Nano Word Count: Well, it's kind of embarrassing.
Frankie: You're a word count. What could you possibly find embarrassing?
Nano Word Count: All of the other word counts are growing. A lot. Every day. Sometimes multiple times in a day.
Frankie: So, you're not every other word count. You're your own word count. You're unique.
Nano Word Count: I don't want to be unique, I want to be like everyone else!
Frankie: Trust me, being like everyone else is so not the point of life.
Nano Word Count: Except it's the point of MY life. I exist so that I can increase and one day grow to 50,000! And right now, it's like you're keeping me from puberty!
Frankie: Word counts go through puberty?
Nano Word Count: Yes! All the other word counts are teasing me. They keep showing off how they have five digits and laughing at me for only having four.
Frankie: Ignore them. There's nothing wrong with having four digits.
Nano Word Count: YES there is! Four digits is acceptable for like the first few days, but it's NOVEMBER 11th! You are supposed to be in FIVE DIGITS BY NOW!
Frankie: Hey, don't yell at me! This isn't my fault.
Nano Word Count: YES it is! This is all your fault. If you'd just write more and update me...
Frankie: Well, maybe my novel isn't going so well, and I needed time to regroup.
Nano Word Count: TIME TO REGROUP? TIME TO REGROUP! It's Nanowrimo. You don't have time to regroup!
Frankie: Ok, if you're going to be a punk, maybe I don't want to up your word count.
Nano Word Count: You better increase my word count! Or else...
Frankie: Or else what?
Nano Word Count: Or else I'm going to tell EVERYONE that your personified me to look like we could have an actual conversation but you're actually just talking to yourself. Boo-yah!
Frankie: ....
Nano Word Count: ...
Frankie: Don't ever say Boo-yah again.
Nano Word Count: Update me please?????????
Frankie: I'll take it into consideration.
Oh, Frankie, I love you. Our word counts can sulk in their four-digit pre-pubescence together.
ReplyDeleteJust decided that I hate the word "pre-pubescence" even more than "moist."
The reason I can't do Nano: my drafts are usually too long. By hundreds of thousands of words. Yes. Hundreds.
ReplyDeleteYour word count can hang out with mine. He'll feel at home there.
ReplyDeleteThis is so something I would do. Love this conversation with your word count. :)
ReplyDeleteAhahaha! Yes, please, don't ever let your word count say "boo-yah" ever again. Please!
ReplyDeleteAnd the only reason I'm in 5 digits is because I started in September. NaNo scares me silly. But, um, good luck with it!
@Donna, MOIST MOIST MOIST! J/K...
ReplyDelete@Matthew, So what you're saying is you would rock NANO and then some...
@Jessica, Yay, he'll be so happy to have a friend. Or she...my word count hasn't really told me yet if it's a boy or girl...
@Karen, hehe, you're my kind of person then:-)
@Joanne, I will try, but those word counts are very hard to control! Good luck to you too!
Ohhh. In China, the number "four" is unlucky because the pronunciation of "four" in Chinese is a homophone for the word "death" as well! Thus I'm afraid I'll have to agree with your Word Count. D: Better go for the five digits, dear.
ReplyDelete~TRA
The Red Angel Blog
You're one funny person.
ReplyDelete